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Don Miguel Monster Taquito: Chicken & Cheese

After a quiet and somewhat relaxing (you know what they say about loose lips) weekend I am back in full force. Today’s mission was to have another hot lunch item from the gas station. And I succeeded with unquestionable aplomb.

Hungry and on my lunch break, I head over to the gas station and hurry to the hot box. I mean, warm foods box. My choices include mini cheeseburgers, corn dogs, quesadillas and monster taquitos. As the first two had opaque packaging, I figure I’m safe with the latter. And the ingredients were as transparent as the container.

Not that it was an invisible taquito. Don Miguel states boldly and plainly that this meal contains “Seasoned Chicken Leg Meat & Cheddar Cheese in a Crispy Flour Tortilla”. In today’s day and age it’s refreshing to know which part of the animal you’re eating. Almost makes me sympathetic. But I was too hungry for sympathies.

The first bite is pretty standard for the first bite of a taquito: Disappointing. It’s like eating a slice of pizza by starting from the crust. A mouthful of dry, flaky exterior and none of the gooey, good stuff. Bite #2 was better, but not by much. After the appetizing aroma, the warm, soft texture of the chicken and cheese combo was welcome. However, the tortilla was so stale. I know I shouldn’t complain about gas station food that’s been hanging around all day, but who wants a stale lunch or snack?

That’s right. Nobody.

As I eat, I try my hardest to remain objective and not let my hunger  color my thoughts. Actually, I think my hunger made me more upset that I wasn’t satisfying my lunch craving with something more … satisfactory.

The chicken definitely tastes like leg meat and the cheese is gooey (love that word). But the stale wrapping ruined it. I only continue to sample the two sauces I chose to pair with my meal: Salsa del Sol Picante Sauce and Taco Sauce.

My taco sauce experience is ok. It’s nice an thick, which is a great texture match to the taquito’s contents. However, the mild flavor is borderline sweet, which isn’t really ideal.

Salsa del Sol’s contribution was more impressive: Spice. While it is the runnier of the two toppings, that zesty flavor was desperately needed. I put my brain to work, along with my mouth, and squeeze a dollop of each onto the taquito before taking a bite.  This move proves successful and as I finish my taquito I was grateful to have a flavorful distraction from the overall bland experience.

The gas station knows no fury like a hungry customer scorned. I need a large meal in the middle of my day and the taquito barely sufficed. Steer clear my friends, this option isn’t worth it.

Nutrition Info

Calories 280, 14% DV
Total Fat 9g, 13% DV
Sodium 760mg, 31% DV

*These calculations are based on a 2,000 calorie diet, which is indulgent and wholly unrealistic.


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